I am ready to blow up/import a virus/throw a flaming bag of dog poop on their doorstep to Sallie Mae, or whatever it is named now.  Every time I call, I cannot seem to get a person on the other end of the line that speaks fluent English.  I am all about diversity, but please don't thread my call through the Burma office.  I want to speak to a nice lady name Carol or Patsy that can really answer my questions.

A few more things:
I better not "catch" Ebola. 

If ISIS comes knocking, I'm sicking Biscuit on their fannies.  I will be closely following with a dirty diaper and my crockpot.  Take no prisoners.

I played some Notorious B.I.G. for my 16 year old neighbor.  Her response? "What is this?!?" Her younger sister quickly replied, "OH, this is that music from the olden days."  And there you have it.

My 35th birthday came and went.  Nothing spectacular.  Oh how I miss the days of day drinking at SJC in the IM field, knowing your birthday will be celebrated by everyone.  Not so much. 

I have fired up my old MP3 player in the hopes of inspiring some sort of exercise like movements during the course of the day.  I have nothing to report.

The Lions are off to a decent start.  My fingers are still crossed for a Superbowl appearance. 

New reality television obsessions:  Below Deck.  I want to charter a yacht now.

Fall is here. Bring on the sweatpants and Uggs.  (Happy face.)

So I have hit the three month mark as being a mom of two.....seriously, this is challenging.  I think I do 7 million loads of laundry a week, adding to the 40 millions minutes of picking up and doing the dishes.  Rinse and repeat.  My mantra for the day.  Greta started preschool today, which will give me some time to begin working out again.  No more of this 30 pound weight I am carrying. 

Just a few things....

I am at a loss for words in regard to the news lately....ISIS, Ferguson, naked pictures.....I'm just over it.  Apparently I'm a racist if I comment on Ferguson, regardless if I consider myself an educated person who is very mindful of race, religion, and politics.  I refuse to comment on the ISIS situation, because it is too devasting and crazy to comprehend.  While I am somewhat mindful of others' faith practices, this ISIS bullshit is ridiculous.  And finally, the naked pictures.  Here's some food for thought....if you don't want people to see you naked, don't take pictures of yourself naked.  I guess this is pretty hard to follow.  I surely wouldn't want anyone taking pics of me naked....Good grief.

I have a few new obsessions...
*Party Down South.  Total garbage television.
*Bachelor in Paradise.  Even worse garbage television.
*I have rediscovered Pinterest.  A total time suck.
*My new minivan. We said Adios to my red Subaru.  I was super sad to see her go, but it was time to welcome a new swagger vehicle....a white Honda Odyssey.  Her name is Anne Wilson Springsteen (after my favorite Wilson sister in the band Heart, and Bruce Springsteen---a no brainer.)
*Several of my gal pals are welcoming new hatchlings into the world.  Smooshiness is always good.
*Beans celebrated her 10th birthday.  My first born.  Loves her.

I am a bad blogger.  I blame Mary Katharine.  I have no time.  However, I did brush my teeth today.  Therefore, I am awesome.  My house is a disaster.  I am thankful for caffeine and neighbors, who make my days so much better.  Seriously, two kids is no joke.  I feel crazy most of the day, considering MK likes to be held all the time, fusses a lot, and only sleeps at night, of course no more than 3 hours at a time.  Hooray!

However, I am now obsessed with Party Down South.  It is absolute garbage but it makes me feel normal and smart.

And for all you wondering, I am not even close to my pre-pregnancy weight.  Kthanks.

Welp this Olympics are over and I am sad.  A poor showing in speed skating and hockey, but all in all, a fairly entertaining show.  I will gloat a bit here:  Steve Holcomb, driver for USA 1 2-man and 4-man bobsled teams, tweeted me.  This is par for my course.  I have been obsessed with becoming an Olympic bobsledder for some time, acknowledging this may be my only chance to participate in an Olympics at my age and my "fitness" level.  While I understand this is serious business, I think with proper training, I might have a shot.  (Like 1:10000000 odds.)

And it seems we might be facing yet another winter storm in Fort Awesome on Sunday.  FML.  Seriously.  I am over winter.  I don't think you will ever hear me say that again, because I usually LURV winter.  But seriously, I am over this cold and snow.  Shit, I can't even ski now.  Really, just shoot my eye out.

Watched "Being Farrah" on MTV this morning.  Apparently this is a catch up special on Teen Mom's original member, Farrah.  What a joke.  She IS a porn star who cashed in on her poor choices.  Good for her.  Just keep me out of it.  She best needs to be spending her well made money on a great therapist for her (and her daughter). 

Mimi and Pepe made a visit down here this past weekend that was jam packed with playing, references to Nascar, and all things Costco.  It was a smashing good time and Greta was very much upset this morning, wanting to know where Mimi and Pepe were.  I had to explain that they went home to go to "school" (work) and we will be seeing them in a few weeks.  Not okay with Gertie.  Dad gifted Gertie with a new toy:  A large plush lamb named Fred, fresh from a large box near the meat aisle in Costco.  Fred is now her reading buddy and sleeping buddy.  Fred, along with the rest of Gertie's gang (Pooh Bear (a plush toy that is NOT related to the Christopher Robin series), her "guys", a group of rubber squishy toys from the dollar aisle at Target). 

I am at 26 weeks and I am over being preggo.  Not complaining, just saying.  Ugh.  I suppose the amount of Dunkin Donuts pastries and Oreos consumed this weekend are not helping.

Happy Wednesday!

First, I had a wonderful playdate with two amazing ladies and their amazing children.  It is always great to be in great company with great conversation while our children play nicely.  Loudly, but nicely. 

Secondly, I am fuming mad right now.  After an hour long discussion with my freshman in high school neighbor, I am having SERIOUS doubts about sending Greta through the public education system.  Morgan, the neighbor, was showcasing her normal homework load.  I was not impressed.  Busy work, worksheets, thoughtless assignments, clearly from a vapid old tired teacher (s) with no intention of really teaching the students anything.  Morgan's big assignment for the night was a thesis essay, 3 pages, MLA format on the cause of WWI.  No introduction.  No prior/introductory knowledge/info to draw upon.  She has one day to do an assignment that was not modeled for her, "I do, we do, you do," with 200 pts. on the line.  Not okay.  I was fuming mad.  If this is the model/basis/norm for Homestead HS's freshman, Greta will NOT be attending.  There is a reason for homework.....practice what we learned today.  There is a reason for several kinds of assessments---"let's see if you know what you are doing."  New unit of study?  Let's kick it off with something exciting and fun to reel my students in so they are more engaged.  WWI is a HUGE part of world history.  I guess it is now covered in 2 weeks, celebrated with a 3 page essay.  Forget Franz Ferdinand and trench warfare.   I am very disturbed.  AND, this teacher apparently does not tolerate questions from her kids.  "If you don't know it, it isn't my fault."  WRONG OH.  Yet another reason why I hate the state of teaching today.  I won't go back.  Ever.  I could not handle having a teacher in my department like this.  They are old, bored, and hate their job.  Don't like it? LEAVE. 

I'm sure KADY will have something to say about this.  OH, and apparently because of all the missed days because of the weather, students are expected to just kinda breeze through all of the missed work and just know it already......Not sure how this works.  No delay in the quiz/test schedule.  GENIOUS.

And don't get me started on standardized tests........all of this makes homeschooling look more attractive.  I'd like Greta to experience Eastover Elementary and East Hills Middle School.  I had great teachers, which I didn't know at the time.  The men and women who taught me were passionate, caring, and clearly loved their jobs.  They were good at it.  It was evident in the results they saw in their students.  Their lessons were creative.  None of this worksheet crap business.  Ugh.

SIDENOTE:  I've been following a thread on my little sister's FB account, Dana Monforton. 32 comments later, I've learned an acquaintance from school is not only a jack ass, but a sexist, ignorant, bro-dude who is clearly misinformed.  I have no idea how he is married to a woman (who is not a man).  I'm embarrassed for him.  I invite you to read the thread.  I'm sure most of my blog readers are friends with Dana on FB.  It is seriously comical.  This, only to book end my twin's FB post about the people who bitch about their healthy children.  That was hilarious.  I guess it takes some serious health concerns to realize how lucky one can, especially when it relates to your children.  I know first hand what it is like to be scared TO DEATH about your child.  Not fun.  Sure, Greta has her days, but I never take her for granted or disrespect my job as her mother by exploiting her through some dumb FB post.  Really. 

And finally, hugs to my friend Katie who lost a friend this past week.  My heart is heavy for Katie, losing a friend.  My heart is heavy for the family who lost such an amazing wife, mother, and daughter.  Time is precious.

Oh more snow.  10" to be exact.  I am gloating over here, knowing my trusty Suby (Subaru) can navigate any of our icy roadways.  Sadly, our addition has horrible roads because no one here knows how to plow.  Not my problem. 

Greta is at the babysitter today, and it must be known that I have been somewhat productive:  Banana Bread, called three different places about misc. billing charges, returned some shirts to the mall.  Not a bad day.  Oh, and the dogs got their teeth cleaned.  Poor Beanie has horrible teeth and their $300 bill reflects that.  Ugh.

AND the Olympics start tonight.....I am more than excited.  I have already cried twice watching the get-to-know the athlete specials on NBC.  That means I am ready to begin cheering for our country.  My dream of becoming an Olympic bobsledder is on the back burner because of my growing belly.  A girl can dream.....

The mercy of the cold weather is ravaging my house----I have my first sinus infection/strep throat bout of the winter season.  Thankfully, I got it early.  (Less than 24 hrs after I noticed I was not feeling so hot), and thanks to a much needed trip to the walk in clinic, I am medicated and feeling better.  Nothing like feeling like your head is in a vice.  I am thankful for a wonderful MIL who took Gertie for the entire day on Tuesday while I retreated to my couch.  I am also thankful for the availability of a fabulous babysitter, Kiki, who took Gertie yesterday.  Today I am feeling muchos better.  A trip to a potential preschool, an oil change, and a trip to the local thrift store definitely felt like a productive morning.  (I still can't believe I am thinking about schools for Greta.  Time surely flies by.)

We survived our second bout of SUPER cold weather this week, offering temperatures from -10 to -22 degrees on Monday and Tuesday.  Um, I'll pass.  If we received a fresh layer of snow, I wouldn't be as bitter.  This time, no new snow, just cold.  Yuck.  We are suppose to get some accumulation tomorrow and Saturday, followed by a bigger dump on Tuesday.  My days of teaching haven't escaped me, as I still check my phone right when I get up to see if I "have school."  I suppose that will never go away.  Around here, the kids are looking to make up a week of school and we aren't even into February yet.

ATTENTION READERS:

If anyone is interested in donating some items, services, gift certificates to help  benefit an auction for my friend Kristy, please do!  Read about her here: 

https://www.facebook.com/kare4kristy

Kristy lives two streets away from Jennie and has become a great friend to Jennie.  Phil, Kristy's husband, was in Jennie and Chris' wedding and it is unbelievable that this is happening.  It is too close to home and incredibly sad.  If you have any money to spare or items you'd like to donate for auction, please contact Jennie, 812-343-1363.  Their medical bills are through the roof and she is still facing years of therapy ahead of her.  Anything will help!



Here are a few topics to think about.....

1.  Peyton Manning in the Super Bowl AFTER leaving the Colts.  I hope Jim Ursay is pissing himself.  Ursay is a douche who can't dress and clearly made a horrible decision.
2.  I am almost 22 weeks and I feel like my ass can't get any bigger.  OOOOhhhh I am SO excited for the next 18 weeks.  Sign me up.
3.  Our new mattress could not get here soon enough.  My back is killing me.
4.  My parents are on holiday.......for a bit......it is 80 degrees there every day.  Not.  Okay.
5.  My house is a disaster and even if I had the money to hire a cleaning lady, I'd be too embarrassed to let her in my dirty house.
6.  I need a vacation.
7.  Garage sale season is around the corner and I cannot wait.
8.  All I crave these days are lemonade, barbeque chips, and Italian sandwiches.  However, Chik Fil A is filling in nicely.
9.  My mommy guilt of not working for the last month is starting to catch up with me.  A master's degree and no income!?!?  That is my slogan every day that I wake up.  However, my time with Gertie is pretty amazing. 

Happy Thursday!

Note to self:

When Fort Wayne is expecting ANY snow amount, brace yourself.  The Rapture is approaching.  No joke.  Forget about any meat, dairy, bread, or water at Kroger.  Batten down the hatches and prepare yourselves.  It is ridiculous.  Further, when there is some amount of snow/ice on the roads, that does NOT mean drive like a crazed maniac in your Escalade or drive like Grandma Moses going 3 miles an hour.  Drive cautiously and slow down.  It is really not a big deal.  I feel like I need to get on the news and reconfirm to everyone that we won't die, face extinction, or find ourselves engulfed in flames.  This isn't the Hunger Games.

Moreover, I am going to shoot my eye out if I go another day listening to anyone bitch about Obamacare.  Seriously.  Let's talk about the NFL, subzero temperatures, OR how pretty the snow is. 

Christmas hath come and gone and I am currently loving the sunshine and snow that the New Year brought us.  I decided to go on hiatus with the Clean by Carrie, considering my back and hamstrings could not take it anymore.  Trips the chiropractor and Dave listening to me complain was enough for me---while I am only half way through the pregnancy, common sense tells me cleaning WON'T get any easier.  I decided to go with my gut and hang it up for now.  I am currently looking for a receptionist job---I run around enough with Gertie, I suppose I should find something stationary for the time being. 

It has actually been really nice, staying home with Greta for the last few weeks.  We have a nice schedule that includes at least a two hour nap in the afternoon.  I can't complain. The neighbor kids have been home for the last week and Greta loves having them over.  It is even better not having anxiety about what the week has to offer, juggling cleanings and trying to keep up with house.  I suppose this is a good time to mention a resolution I have for myself:  stop biting off more than I can chew.  I am notorious for this.  I will and take things as they come.

Aside for the holidays, and me going on a job hiatus, Dave got a new car.  The ol' Honda was ready to cross her rainbow bridge and I gladly ushered her across.  He purchased a 2011 Hyundai Sonata and he loves it.  He has an hour long commute to work and he deserves to drive that is SAFE and comfortable.  My Subura is great for now, but come spring, she'll be replaced as well.  The Forester can't accommodate two car seats.  It is too small.  Again, great foresight on my behalf.

Not only did Dave get a new car, but the Detroit Lions CANNED Schwartz!  (Great transition, right?)  I am waiting with baited breath upon their coaching choice. Bill Cowher and Jon Gruden are out of the mix, which stinks, but there are great choices out there.   Just not Jim Caldwell.  The Lions need someone who can run the show and deal with Stafford's ego. 

 

Oh cleaning.  Last night, I cleaned the filthiest apartment.  With the light of one lightbulb.  Five hours later, and 7 dirty rags later, I think I did a good job.  Too bad I worried all night about the things that could only be seen in good light.  At what point do you replace the stove, floor, cabinets, and countertops?  I am going back today because I am totally freaked out that my mark wasn't excellent.  We shall see.....

Apparently Indiana is on some "snow alert."  Woke up this morning to find NO Snow.  We call that trickery in the Land of Carrie.  Not only was I upset, but Gertie was not happy too.  So unhappy, she wore regular play clothes to the babysitter. 

Further, I am a bit disappointed about the current display of Christmas lights NOT displayed in our neighborhood.  Very disappointed.  We should be seeing at least 4 alien landing pads per block.  Instead, we get two strands of blah lights, mismatched, and in no particular order or fashion.  C'mon people!  That is the best you've got?!?!

To hopefully change our luck, we will be heading to Franke Park on Sunday for a Christmas carriage ride through the parade of lights display.  Lots of baby Jesus' and lots of Ho-Hos.  It better be good.

 

Her Halloween get-up:  Lame princess dress, puppy backpack, and a Lions hat. 

 

Waiting for trick-or-treaters.  Her favorite part of the festivities.
 

OH MY, have I been busy.  With the holiday (hallerdays) season kicking off this weekend (we set up Greta's tree), cleaning, Dave working, and watching Beau for the last week, this has been a crazy few days.  Actually, few months.  The business, Clean by Carrie, has slowed down quite a bit.  I went from having 10 residential clients to just four. With folks changing jobs, marital status changes, and with Christmas shopping approaching, having your house cleaned is a total luxury.  Sadly,  I am the one taking a hit.  It actually has worked out pretty good because.........................I'm prego.  Yep, the baby apartment is occupied.  While we weren't "trying," (and I always HATE when people have said that/say that), I was a fool to think otherwise.  We literally didn't have to "try."  So, baby #dos is due June 8th, Gertie's bday.  It technically has a due date, but it will come before then, thanks to a little something called "scheduled C-section."  No labor for me, which is FINE.  I've been pretty tired and blah feeling.  I basically have no energy and our own house/homemaking duties that I usually take on have completely fallen to the wayside.  Seriously, I have a 10 hour window of energy and once that is gone, I'm in bed.  No later than 8.  Seriously.  Dave has been pulling up the slack by helping out a bit more, even though he is still working a ton.  I don't know how women with more than 1 kid do this.  So, I'm pregnant.  Good times. 

In the past few months, we've also finally settled the house/home inspector lawsuit-situation.  We went to mediation two weeks ago and settled.  We didn't get exactly what we wanted to repair all of the water damage/fix everything, but with 50% of what we asked for, it is better than what Dave thought we'd get.  I went into it knowing I was right and THEY were wrong, and I had to get my point across.  I was not about to let the home owners/home inspector/mobility company pull the wool over my eyes.  It was clearly evident that all three parties had zero integrity, in regard to the ability to maintain a decent house, and disclose any problems it might have.  This has been a huge learning experience for me.  In the future, I will definitely be a part of every tiny aspect of selling our house, finding a new house, then buying a house.  It is the largest investment of your life, so why wouldn't you take your time?  I find it interesting that real estate agents expect a buyer to go out in one day, find a house, make an offer, and be done with it in a week. Now I know that is definitely NOT how things should go down.  I've been inspired to do something in an effort to make sure this does not happen to someone else in the future.  I wish there were more resources to home buyers/home owners about the dangers of bad contractors and crappy real estate.  I'm also very much interested in a home owner's idea of maintaining a house.  With the lawsuit going on, I began to pay a lot more attention to our own neighborhood and just how outdated it really looks.  I have been to 2 open houses in the neighborhood in the last few months and I couldn't believe how dated the décor was, and the realtor's play it off as "updated."  Very.  Disturbing.  Not just interiors, but exteriors as well---landscaping, siding, windows, etc.  Yikes.  Thankfully, I think our neighborhood is at the beginning of a transition--older folks moving out, younger folks moving in.  Now if there was a way to ensure these newbies had some taste.  Hmmm.....

And I'm sitting here, with strep throat, feeling incredibly unproductive, however I feel like garbage. It has given me a chance to spend an hour on Pinterest, only to remind me of all of the projects I'd like to finish/start.  I have two chairs in the garage I'd like to reupholster, a ladder I'd like to paint to make into a hook/storage thing for the laundry room, a HUGE mess in the basement I'd like to do something with---the list goes on.  This day also pushes me back a day with cleanings, something I don't like doing before a weekend.  Thankfully, I have great clients who are very understanding.  I suppose this was one reason why I love being self employed:  making my own hours and picking my own clients.  A charmed career.

And to commence today's lack of activities, Biscuit decided to kick things off right, bringing up a prescriptive offering right to my door:  A dead rabbit's head.  Yep, a freshly decapitated adult rabbit.  Soft ears and all.  Thankfully, she licked all the blood off, so there were no carpet stains.  Now, I just wait for her to have horrible digestive issues.  GREAT.  It was like the Corleone house all up in here.

My Friday Night Lights obsession continues....I am ready to begin season 4.  I'd invite you to start watching, but with a SERIOUS warning:  You'll become addicted.

I blame my most recent lapse of blogging from newest obsession:  Friday Night Lights AND Southern culture, i.e., fashions, child rearing, and home-making.  Jennie first mentioned FNL a few months ago, and I quickly wrote off her compliments.  This past month, I DVR'd a few episodes, watched one, and instantly became hooked.  We are talking INTERVENTION style.  I finished Season 2 last night, thanks to my local library carrying the first 3 seasons.  I'm saving the 3rd season until this weekend.  I have 2 houses to clean tomorrow, and 1 on Friday.  Saturday is a bit nuts, so I'm saving myself for Sunday.  You know, the day of rest, or my day to obsess a bit more over FNL. 

Now, I'm ready to discuss Southern women.  My obsession started years ago when I first saw Steel Magnolias, a term given to an older Southern woman who has lived through stress and drama and maintained her grace, reputation and dignity.  I only dream to be called a SM when I am old.  I've been googling like crazy, trying to find some literature on the sociology of the South, but I've come to a bit of a road block.  I believe my best research will be done via Facebook, connecting with some of my friends from Arkansas.  I'm not sure what it is about the South, but I suppose it is the obvious differences about women that I have met that were born and raised there----their appearance, understanding of the home and family, their fashions.  Again, it is so interesting.  It is right up there with wealthy Persian families in the US and hoarding.

My Clean by Carrie business is going great!  I'm lucky to have several amazing clients that have passed my name on to friends, family and neighbors.  I have a new client cleaning on Friday and a jam packed week next week.  It has been a great way for me to make new friends as well.  I am truly blessed.

Next topic:  I am undertaking a drastic diet change in an effort to help get my skin cleared up.  I was diagnosed with Perioral Dermatitis a few months ago, and it has worsened.  I am not open to taking Accutane or oral antibiotics, which is truly the best treatment.  These aren't options for me currently, as I am seriously considering having another  baby.  I don't need any more 4 legged/tailed creatures in my house.  So, my diet is the obvious area of change.  I'm going gluten/dairy free for 8 weeks, hoping this might calm things down.  I've also heard of the Failsafe Diet as a possible option.  Who knows----I'm open to anything at this point.  I look like a 13 year old band dork.  Tim Riggins would not look twice at me. 

Topic of the Day:
Getting the last word. 

This phrase seems to play a major role in my personality----an inability to allow others, especially those who I find to be ignorant, unjust, rude, or just plain wrong, to have the "final" say in a conversation and/or argument.  I find this phrase to be especially annoying when I KNOW I am valid in my comments, opinions, thoughts, or feelings.  As if, I am unable to completely and wholly process their side of the story or argument.  It resonates in my head for days, often weeks because I was unable to verbalize those residual feelings.  Unfortunately, those feelings often create a mock-dialogue in my head that is almost impossible to erase.  (Much like an inner dialogue, but this conversation plays out in your everyday thought process.)  SO ANNOYING.  I feel like my "getting the last word" is the nail in the coffin that allows me to justify, uphold, and support my character, feelings, or plainly, my side of the story-----as if nothing was left unsaid.  "What if....."  "I should have......"  Ugh.  These words are like mosquito bites that never go away.  Ugh.

And here I am again, a month later with LOTS to say.  Here we go:

Trayvon Martin/George Zimmerman:  Trayvon attacked this guy, was hanging out where he didn't belong, and the media made a race circus about this case.  I feel bad for both families, but mostly G. Z. because his life is destroyed.  Clearly, he is taking responsibility for his actions, and is obviously not a racist killer.

Paula Deen:  She is a lady from the South.  People down there have a different culture.  I doubt she is a racist.  Her comments caught up with her.  Her food still is good.

Max Scherzer going 13-0.  He plays for Detroit.  I need not say more.

NSA/traitor/espionage:  Give this guy a break.  He isn't a rat.  He shared info that is valuable to every American.  He should be welcomed back with open arms and given a sick retirement package.  I doubt this is a dude that people want to punish.  Send him to Fiji for the rest of his life, with no computer. 

Mirena (IUD):  Bad.  News.  This is the culprit for the nerve pain in my hands, thinning hair, horrible cystic face acne, weight gain, and worsening ADD symptoms.  No one told me.  Never again. 

Prop 8 reversal:  Finally, people are getting their heads on straight.  The bottom line:  Marry whomever you'd like.  Just pay your taxes, take care of your kids, and mow your lawn.  No big deal.  If you are in a committed relationship with a person, and take care of each other, and go before your family and friends to commit to each other, then you should be privy to the same benefits as everyone else, regardless if this other person is the same gender as you.  It is no one's business.  "Marriage" wasn't created until some person invented the phrase.  I know, because I looked it up.  Yes, a human invented this term.  Jesus didn't come into play until thousands of years after humans began a social evolution, enough to partner up with another human and have a relationship.  There were no courts, no established churches, and no one throwing around the phrases "gay marriage," or "fundamentally wrong."  Therefore, let's move on and focus on more important issues like welfare reform, or education reform.  NOW, those are issues worth talking about because they are costing this country MILLIONS of dollars.  MILLIONS.  To me, it is actually embarrassing how "big" of an issue this has become.  I'm pretty sure those men and women who are ardently against gay marriage may have something they'd like to share----like their own homosexual tendencies and their own insecurities about sharing who they REALLY are.  But once again, it is no one's business.  I hope to God (or Krishna, or Yahweh, or whoever) that Greta feels safe enough to share with me and the rest of her family who she loves and wants to commit herself to (when the time is right).  God forbid she does not feel safe, welcome, supported enough to keep a large part of her life secret because it is considered unacceptable.  To quote several tweets this past week, "#loveislove" 

I am in the midst of expanding my cleaning empire.  I have invested $100 in business cards, a car magnet, return label stickers, and an advertisement in a local play program to market Clean by Carrie.  I have two more potential clients I am bidding this weekend.  I feel confident that I can eventually grow Clean by Carrie into a money-making venture for myself.  I am still juggling the cleaning and working at the restaurant.  Some weeks are more relaxing than others, but I am mostly running around like a chicken with its head cut off.  I am so thankful for Jim and Joan.  They definitely are pulling up the rear with their help with Greta.  I would eventually like to grow Clean by Carrie, so it is sustaining itself with myself and possibly one more employee.  If Jennie was down here, we'd turn the shit out---Bam.  Seriously.  (Or my friend, Jamie.  She is a great cleaner.) 

And finally, a sad note.  My friend, Kady, is moving.  Back to Michigan.  For the second time.  Kady and I met in graduate school (at Marian).  We would eventually merge paths again in Bloomington, because her husband (Tyson) was a year ahead of Dave in MBA school (at IU).  Dave and Tyson played baseball against each other in high school.)  They headed up to Michigan after Tyson finished his MBA.  THEN, after two years and two babies, they headed back to Fort Wayne.  We followed them to Fort Wayne a year later.  So, here we are, and there they go.  Back up to the D.  Not okay.  However, Tyson has a great opportunity with GM and Kady doesn't have to work.  Win win.  OH, and they can go to Tigers games and eat Coney Island whenever they please.  I am a bit jealous.  It has been pretty nice having a fellow mom two miles away that knows the adventures of mothering a toddler.  Kady was the first person to really inform me about what it is like to be pregnant and give birth.  (We are talking REAL information here.  I.e., lady parts, breastfeeding, and the birth process.)  There aren't many folks out there that will be "fo-real" with a fellow sister.  Ya herd?  So, on that note, I'm dedicating this blog to Kady.  You are the real deal.  AND, you are a great crafter.  Plus, you have cute kids.  All in all, you are a great friend and I will miss your presence in Fort Awesome.  (Tear.)   

Kady and I in Berkley.  Josie is in Kady's belly.  Greta was no longer in my belly, but I still had a belly.  

It is pointless for me to remark about how busy I've been.  This week marks the beginning of my lunch shifts at the restaurant, as I take over for another waitress who is directing a local summer camp.  I'm also still cleaning, hoping to acquire a few more clients.  I've actually probably bitten off more than I can chew---I launched a "website" on Facebook.  This provides me with the opportunity for free advertising---word of mouth seems to be the most successful marketing I've done.  Clean by Carrie is now on the web:  https://www.facebook.com/CleanByCarrie

Once again, I'm sure I've bit off more than I can chew.  However, I've very excited about the potential for business, and more opportunities.  We'll see what happens.

Happiness on Memorial Day Weekend:

1.  Finding Fat Tire on clearance at Target.
2.  Temperatures BELOW 80 degrees.
3.  Finally catching up with all the laundry.
4.  Enjoying some family time after nice trip to the zoo.
5.  Completed a lighting project that I started MONTHS ago.  Pinterest.
6.  Found some great deals at Kroger and Target, and I had coupons.  Cha-ching.
7.  Today is Dougie Fresh's birthday, aka, Doug Monforton.  He is younger than 70 but older than 22.
8.  Dave's brother Ben, the baseball brother, made it to the NCAA tournament in Oregon. 

And most importantly, I am forever grateful for all of the men and women who currently serve, have served, and lost their lives in the military.  I never take my freedom for granted.

With the help of my first house cleaning client in Fort Wayne, I now have three clients.  While I was very apprehensive about become a "cleaning lady," it has actually turned out to be a pretty good gig.  I am my own boss, I make my own hours, I don't have to "deal" with anyone, and I know I am good at cleaning.  (Thanks to Mrs. Goble and Shannon Lalain---the queens of cleaning 101). 

I acquired my most recent client today, thanks to my first clients' referral.  While I'm sure my plate is pretty full, I think one more would seal the deal.

Here's a cleaning tip:  Real Windex (with ammonia) is the best grease cutter.  The Works toilet cleaner is the best toilet cleaner.  They have both at the dollar store.  None of that $8 dollar stuff. 

Also, it is best to go from top to bottom---dust on furniture and fans settle to the floor when disturbed (that doesn't stick to a dust rag).  Vacuuming should be the final (or best part) of cleaning a room.  Also, I use the crevice tool constantly---tons of dirt and dust settle right between the carpet and the base trim.

Getting a gross tub or shower takes several attempts of cleaning to make it look sparkling---layers of soap scum and build up is very hard to remove when you only have 4 hours to clean a whole house.  Hot vinegar and dawn dish soap (equal parts) help, but nothing works better with that than a plastic scouring sponge and elbow grease.  And a lot of it.

Happy cleaning!

I am about two weeks into my new "working mom" lifestyle, and I must say, it sucks.  I do enjoy working, and getting a paycheck,  but there are many a' things that are suffering......laundry....home cleanliness.....meals planned for the week......Thankfully, Dave's parents have been super helpful, along with some great girlfriends, ensuring Greta is well taken care of while I'm busy cleaning OTHER people's houses and serving OTHER people food.  Good Times. 

Spring has sprung on Woodchime Court, only revealing a major lack of landscaping at our friendly abode.  NO perennial flowers, and some some landscaping shrub choices.  I've made many attempts to befriend locals gardeners (craigslist, upcycle.com, etc.) and I've come up empty handed.  I seriously may have to resort to my "go-to" flower lady:  Mrs. Goble.  Her yard is filled with a lush assortment of shrubs, trees, perennials, and annuals.  It makes for great visits to Michigan, as there is always something new happening in her yard.  Right now, I'm trying to get a handle on the lack of trees in the yard, hoping to capitalize on the "garbage pile" of greenery at Walmart and Meijer--I've found some pretty fabulous plants in this area.  I highly recommend a visit. 

We had a garage sale on Saturday and we made out like bandits-$214 big ones.  Now, if we could only sell an old heavy kitchen table, a bathroom vanity, and an armoire, we'd be in business.  I'd like to buy a tv for the basement as well as some plants for the yard.  In the meantime, craigslist postings will have to do.

Here's to a week of more hustling, slinging club sandwiches, and mopping floors.  (But in all honesty, I do enjoy my schedule.)

Quite a bit has been going on since my last blog.  Here is the bathroom version:

1.  I got a job.  I actually am, once again, a waitress.  On St. Patrick's Day, Dave, Gertie, and I were already downtown participating in all things Irish, when we stumbled upon Calhoun Street.  While eating a delicious lunch, I decided to ask the very bubbly and kind waitress if they were hiring.  Welp, I filled out an application, and a week later the owner called me.  I have been training for two weeks.  The restaurant has a simple, tasteful, and clean menu.  Great sandwiches, great soups, and great beer.  I am clearly not cool enough to work there, as I have noticed it being a Hipster hang out.  Google the term "Hipster" if you aren't familiar. 


2.  My second job entails cleaning houses.  I have walking through my second client's house tomorrow.  It is nice to have this cash in my pocket because it is easy, mindless money.  I am proud of my cleaning, although my house doesn't reflect it.  HOWEVER, my bathrooms are always clean.  They may be messy, but they are always clean.  Also, the sheets on every bed are CLEAN.  Bleachy, and delicious.

3.  It has been raining.  A lot.  I'm over it. 

4.  Biscuit is still naughty and has escaped the confines of our fence twice.  Naughty.

5.  The Boston Marathon:  Sad.  So sad.  Terrorists are cowards.  They need to find a new hobby and a new "religion" to practice.  My religion involves loving small soft animals and smelling clean laundry.

6.  I found a weekly babysitter for Gertie.  Daycare searching blows the big one and I don't recommend it.  I have come to realize day care centers are filthy and the employees are rude, and getting rich off the working woman's dime.  Not okay.  Thankfully, Ms. Alicia, Gertie's new sitter, is nice and delightful.  Her son Cristian, is so stinking cute.  AND, her husband, Brad, played sports with Kyle.  A win-win.

7.  In honor of spring's arrival, while Greta and I were in the D last weekend, we took the time to visit the school farm.  All I'm going to say is Baby. Goats.  Yep, LOTS of baby goats and baby lambs and a few peacocks.  Who needs Xanax?!  Oh my.  Lots of softies.  I'm sure I contracted some crazy strain of gona-syphill-herpe-aids, but I'm a better woman for it.

8.  I will begin preparing for our May 1-2 garage sale.  I'm hoping to make $300, selling some furniture that is no longer needed, and other home treasures.  I'm hoping to make enough money to buy a SMALLER television for the family room and a large console table for it to sit upon.  Again, a win-win.

9.  Tiger baseball is in full swing.  To mark the occassion, I hit up the Salvation Army in the D. and found a bounty of Detroit sport teeshirts for Gertie.  For me?  A hot pink J Crew teeshirt for work. 

10.  I started to tackle our landcaping, er, lack there of.  I have moved one bush.  Four more to go.  I'd like to win a $10,000 landscape makeover to solve our "no tree" problem. 

Happy Friday!