I thought I had problems....
Greta and I were rolling through Martinsville, Indiana on my way to get my lady business checked. We were stopped at a traffic light, when a Mustang rolled up. (Nothing special. I'm not a Ford fan.) I glanced over and noticed the driver smoking a cigarette AND wearing an oxygen cannula underneath her nose. AWESOME. Hello!??! Don't people know oxygen is flammable. Oh hell yea. I love Southern Indiana. Therefore, I dedicate today's blog to all of the fuck-o morons out there that smoke while on oxygen, smoke while pregnant, drive drunk, cheat on their partners, wear tapered/pleated pants, have bad highlights, have a muffin top, shovel horse manure, and finally, use the words "acrost," "behindt," and "I'd seen." May God have mercy their souls.
Sorry to cause a wrinkle in your evaluation, but "I'd seen" can be interpreted as proper English, short for "I had seen"---The one that grinds my grit is "I seen"---just skip the "had" completely. Love from your grammar snob mom.
ReplyDeleteI agree with your mom- "I seen" drives me nuts. As does "the dryer is broke" instead of "broken" (and this may have come out of my husband's mouth). Southern IN sounds a lot like Saginaw...
ReplyDelete