Shitstorm

I'd like to take this opportunity to discuss the word "shitstorm." While most folks associate this term with moments of complete chaos, calamity, and disorder, I have other words. In real life, this refers to a situation of a baby or canine persuasion, where poo becomes out of control. For example:
1. A blowout (poo forced violently out the back end (or up) a diaper.)
2. A dog losing total bowel control in a non-bowel friendly environment.
3. Too many conservatives in one room.

Today, the shitstorm happened, yet again, in our living room. Dave and I were out running errands, actually going to the damn foot doctor. Dave re-broke his foot playing soccer last night. No big deal. We made a few a more stops, only being gone for about 2 hours, when we joyfully came home to an interesting odor wafting from the other side of the house. I immediately thought it was some dishes that had food on them. However, as I turned the corner to let the girls out for the ritual pee (after someone walks in the door), I was BLOWN AWAY by the amount of poo (shit) on the carpet. NOT ONLY is the poo the same color as my carpet, it was fresh, warm, and very stinky. Biscuit's ears immediately went back (race horse position), so I knew the culprit. Beans' ears were back too because I'm sure she thought the smell was even worse (dogs are suppose to smell things 100 x's more intensely than humans.) Poor Beans. So Dave, now resting on the couch with his foot propped up, heard my gags, moans, and barf noises while cleaning it up. BUT IT DIDN'T STOP THERE. Just when I thought I had it all cleaned up, I found more---this time in a more "remote" location on the rug (back corner, out of plain sight). Good God. What the hell did I do to deserve this?!?!! Sweet Jesus. So, that is how my afternoon went. Broken Foot. Shitstorm. (Shitstorm is one word, not two....just for the record.)

SO, if there are debts I owe you (readers), mean things I've said, stink eyes I have given you, please forgive me so I can finish my day, poop free, in a normal smelling house. While I know poop will fill my days in a few months, my little girl's poop will be way easier to handle than a load of Biscuit's.

Oh, P.S., this happened three months ago too. I hope to hell this isn't my karma. If so, I'd like Jesus to take me in my sleep.

Furthermore, Biscuit IS housebroken. I'm not sure why her wheels fell off, but I am hoping after a minor scolding, she'll get back on track.

That is all.